


Night Fever

by topshopdestiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1970s, Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, Horse Racing, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2016-07-31
Packaged: 2018-07-26 16:52:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7582141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/topshopdestiel/pseuds/topshopdestiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They loved like the sun and the moon, chasing each other's tails for a single hug or kiss, sometimes just to feel each other's presence. They chased and they chased, but deep down they knew they couldn't be together, not really. They couldn't be free of the challenge they faced when Castiel lost his memory, the space between them growing more and more. The flowers he got Dean for each of their dates sat atop of Dean's dresser, dying along with his hopes of getting the love of his life back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

September 7th, 1972. 

The cold ocean breeze pierced through the small holes in Dean’s knitted red sweater, shoes in hand, while his light brown hair covered his face every time there was a sudden gust of wind. The exposed tan skin of his legs had goose bumps and his nose had turned a slight shade of red. He looked out to the blue waters, his mind wandering at the sound of waves crashing and his bare feet in the cold water put his mind at ease. His mind was absent long enough for him to not notice how long he’d been out; He saw the once gray clouded sky turn hues of pinks and oranges much to his dismay. His feet now resembled dry prunes and raisins as he pulled himself away from the ocean’s water, the dry sand clinging to his wet feet. 

He made his way back to his car stationed right at the beach viewpoint, a half mile walk from where he was. He hadn’t bothered putting his shoes back on, he didn’t even care that his car would have sand virtually everywhere in the driver's seat. The drive home was filled with the static of the radio and rhythmless tapping on the steering wheel. He rolled down the car window, smiling slightly as the cool air hit his face, not bothering to think that he might become sick the next day.

He pulled up into the driveway, stepping out of the car and finding his way inside of his home, the smell of his mother’s meatloaf invading his nose. 

“Dean!” His little brother called out to her before running to him, hugging his right leg as it was the only thing he could reach.

“Hey there Sammy.” He said smiling and giving his brown hair a ruffle. They walked to the kitchen where their mother was finishing dinner and their father was preparing the table. Dean helped his mother bring the food out while their dad helped Sam up onto his chair. 

“Alright, dig in.” Their mother said, clapping her hands happily. And so hand after hand, the food on the platters was transferred to their own plates. They ate happily and peacefully, chatting about work and school when the ring of the doorbell echoed through the house.

“I got it!” Dean said with a full mouth, standing from his chair and trying to swallow the food in his mouth before opening the door. His cheery mood vanished instantly as he came face to face with a man dressed in a dark green suit, pins and patches indicating the was an army serviceman.

“Good evening, we were wondering if we could come in?” He said with a sad smile.

“Y-Yeah, come in,” Dean said quietly, standing to the side to allow him in. "I'll get my parents."

“Dean honey who is it?” His mother called out.

Dean and the man stood in silence. Their father was taken by surprise when he saw them, their mother frightened while Sam just thought their suits looked cool.

“Mr. and Mrs. Winchester.” He said.

“How do they know our last name mommy?” Sammy asked, looking up to his mother, who brushed his hair out of his face and returned her attention to the serviceman in front of her.

“The Secretary of the Army regrets to inform you that your son, Adam was killed in action yesterday on the battlegrounds of Vietnam. He died as a result of several gunshot wounds to the chest. I am truly sorry for your loss.” He said with a frown and sad eyes. Mrs. Winchester almost fell over, but her husband caught her just in time as tears began to stream down her face.

“My son is dead?” She asked, more to herself than to the man standing in front of her. Dean’s heart fell heavy, tears threatening to escape his eyes, though he never did let them fall. His father held his mother as she cried, tears finding their way down his cheeks as he tried desperately to calm her as best he could, but there was no denying the devastation they felt of losing their eldest son. 

“Sam, go to your room.” Dean said, voice cracking. Sam nodded but paused at the hall as he ran back to give his mother a hug.

“It’s okay mommy, don’t cry. I’ve got a lollipop with your name on it.” He said and soon after running down to his bedroom. He was too young to understand, he was 6 years old and Adam had enlisted in the army when he was only months old, so he never got the chance to know his older brother.

Regardless of their parents losing their first born, it was Dean who took the blow harder even though he didn’t show it. He and Adam were more than just siblings, they were best friends and they looked out for each other.

That night was difficult for the whole family, Mrs. Winchester had cried herself to sleep, Mr. Winchester drank his way to sleep, Sam had fallen asleep after making sure his mother and Dean were okay. 

Dean didn’t sleep.

He laid in her bed, staring up at his ceiling deciding on trying to sleep or doing something to put his mind to ease for a while. He knew he wasn’t getting any shut eye, so he stood from the bed and walked to the window, his bare feet dragging on the hardwood floor. He took his racing helmet from the nightstand and fumbled with it. It was Adam’s and he had given it to Dean when he first started riding.

————————————-

His night was spent looking for any artifact his brother had given him, only stopping once the sun began to rise, causing the billions of stars to slowly vanish into the bright orange sunrise. He couldn’t lie, the exhaustion he felt was indescribable, but he also knew he couldn’t sleep for long as his family had a funeral to prepare. His brother would arrive early tomorrow morning in a casket wrapped in the United States flag, and it was something he wasn’t ready to see.

Adam was like a third parent to Dean. Ever since Adam was ten and Dean was six, he would look after him when their parents worked late, and when their parents were too tired or didn't have time, Adam would take him to the park or somewhere else to entertain him so he wouldn’t be cooped up in the house. Adam cooked for him and taught him how to do it himself when he was older and able to reach the stove. Regardless of the small age gap, Adam always looked up to his big brother and the news of his death ripped out a piece of his heart that he would never get back.

His alarm went off at 6:30, the time he would wake up to get himself and Sam ready for school. Not today, there wasn’t the smallest chance that he’d be going to school, or his parents going to work.

He let out a drawn out yawn and rubbed his tired, sleepless eyes before turning the alarm off. He hoped Sam didn’t hear it, he didn’t want to explain why they weren’t going to school, not this early in the day. So he sat on his bed and ran a hand through his messy hair, closing his eyes for what he thought was only a few minutes, but in reality was a few hours. His eyes reopened to the sound of a soft knock on his door.

“Come in.” He says, yawning once more.

“Good afternoon sleepy head.” His mother said with a soft smile as she walked in.

“Afternoon?” He gasped and looked at his clock that read 1:27 pm.

“I didn’t want to wake you, I thought you had a rough night and didn’t sleep, so I left you be.” She said.

“Mom you should’ve woken me, we have things to do and I can’t let you and dad do it all.” Dean said, leaping from the bed.

“Don’t worry about that, Father Chuck came by this morning and helped us plan most of it.” She said, her eyes watering with every word she spoke. “We want you to write the eulogy.”

“Me? What do I know about writing a eulogy?” Dean asked, his breath hitching as the reality of it all finally began to hit him. His beloved brother was dead. They’d bury him soon.

———————————————

The funeral took place 3 days later. 

It was a sunny but cool Vancouver day where the breeze made the tree leaves fall onto Adam’s casket. Dean stood in front of it, smoothing the flag with his slender fingers as he tried to fight back any urge to cry which became harder to do the more he looked at it.

His brother was dead and resting inside there.

He felt a chill run through his body, his suit didn’t have enough warmth to soothe the cold and empty feeling inside him.

He inhaled sharply and began to speak.

“Adam was a very smart and loving man, always putting everyone before himself. He cared about everyone and made it his priority to let these people know that they were loved and cared for. Not once in my entire life did I think low of him, even when he made mistakes he was always the one I looked up to because he was the type of person I always aspired to be. Charismatic, passionate, loving, intelligent, giving, full of life and joy. He was the man I knew I’d never be because he was always so out there, with a confidence that practically radiated off him while I was always shy. I remember he helped me talk to this one girl I had a really big crush on when I was in 9th grade. We were sitting in the school cafeteria, she was sitting at the table across from us, and he said to me, ‘Dean if you don’t get up and talk to that girl so help me I will personally pick you up and plop you down next to her.’ I was really nervous, I mean I was a dorky 14-year old who didn’t have good looks and wore an oversized jacket. You know what he told me though? He said, ‘Go say hi, introduce yourself. I’ll be right here backing you every second. If it doesn’t work out well then we’ll just go out and buy some milkshakes and watch the races.’ He fixed the collar of my shirt and sent me on my way. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out but I did get a milkshake, so that was a plus.” He paused as people laughed quietly. “When Adam enlisted into the war, he took me to buy my very first telescope. He told me that whenever I missed him, I just had to look his old racing helmet, and remember that we are always connected no matter the distance between us and” he paused, tears welling in his eyes, “he did find his way back, just not in the way I had hoped.” He paused again, wiping his eyes. “Adam will be remembered by everyone as a great man and even though he’s not with us anymore, I know he’s somewhere better, somewhere where he won’t have to fear for his life.” He finished with a shaky breath. “Thank you.”

The rest of the funeral went by and Dean was sat under the shadow of a nearby willow tree. His knees were bent to his chest, his chin resting on his knees as he looked out to the people paying their respects. 

He hadn’t realized he was crying until he felt his slacks become wet. 

“Goddamnit.” He swore quietly as he wiped his eyes and tried to recompose himself. His head turned sharply as he felt a hand rest on his shoulder, confused at the man standing by him.

“It’s okay to cry you know. You don’t have to be ashamed or afraid of letting it out.” The man said with a sympathetic look.

“Thanks,” Dean snorted, “but I don’t think I’ll be taking advice from someone I don’t know.” 

“Listen,” the man said taking a seat next to Dean, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through, but I have an idea. Let me tell you that this ‘strong’ act isn’t going to do you any good. If you need to cry, don’t be ashamed or afraid to do so.” The man said, giving Dean a genuine smile when he lifted his head to face him.

“Thanks, but no thanks.” Dean scoffed.

“Well, I can’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, but I hope you do accept this carnation. I thought it might lift your spirits a little.” The boy said, handing him the pink flower which Dean took hesitantly.

“Thanks.” Dean said, spinning the flower in between the flowers. 

“Hang in there Dean.” He said, patting his shoulder before standing and making his way back to the crowd of people hovering over the casket.

Dean never bothered asking the guy’s name, mainly because he thought he’d never see him again and knowing his name would just seem pointless. He thought he’d never see him again, but he was wrong.

After a few days, Dean drove to a local flower shop to get flowers for his brother’s grave, Sam sitting patiently in the back seat as rummaged through the key compartment of his car to find his wallet.

“Alright Sammy, let’s go.” Dean said, getting out of the car, shutting his door shut and opening Sam’s for him to get out. He gave Sam’s hair a good ruffle before walking into the shop.

“Dean look at those blue ones!” Sam said excitedly as he rushed over to a pot that held morning glories.

“Don’t break anything or so help me, we will not go roller bootin’ ya hear?” Dean called out to him.

“I hear!” Sam said back as he got lost in the endless patches of flowers.

“Cute kid. He yours?” The guy at the counter asked. Dean smiled but did a double take as he saw who he was.  
“Oh hey, pink flower guy right?” Dean asked with a smug smile.

“You didn’t answer my question.” The man replied with a small smile. “He yours?”

“Sam? What no he’s my little brother.” Dean said, and the man replied with a shrug.

“He looks like you. So what can I do for you, Dean?” He asked, folding his arms onto the counter.

“How do you know my name?” Dean asked surprised.

“I provided the flowers for your brother’s funeral.” The man replied.

“Yeah, thanks for that. I came by to get some flowers for my brother.” Dean replied. “And I have no idea where to start.”

“Lucky for you, flowers are my thing. We have roses, lilies, daisies, dahlias, lotus, orchids, petunias. You name it, we more than likely have it.” He said smiling.

“I’ll take the roses, Adam was always a traditional ol’ sap.” Dean said with a sad smile. 

“There’s a bucket of roses over in the front by the window, you can take your pick.” The man said. Dean followed his directions and saw the endless amounts of roses in the bucket. He picked out a bunch of white roses and made his way back to the counter. 

“Red seemed too traditional for my taste.” Dean said, receiving a chuckle from the man in front of him.

“63 cents please.” The man said. Dean handed him a dollar bill and shoved the change he received back into his pocket.

“C’mon Sammy let’s go.” Dean called out to Sam who replied with a drawn out whine. He went to thank the guy but gave him a questioning look when he realized he was staring at him. “What?”

“How are you holding up Dean?” He asked, genuine concern in his words.

“Fine.” Dean replied sharply. “Thanks for the flowers.” He said before leading Sam back out to the car. 

Dean dropped Sam off at his friend's house since they were going to have a birthday party, and he didn’t want to gloom the poor kid’s mood before it.

He stood in front of his brother’s grave, white roses in his hand, tears streaming down his face all the while the sky above him turned into a gray blanket of rain clouds, ready to release their own tears.

“I uh, I got you roses.” He said, setting them down in front of his headstone. “I know you liked traditional, but I thought the white was a nice twist don’t you think?” He laughed to himself as he wiped his face. “I miss you, big brother.” He said, kissing his fingers before placing them on his headstone.

It began to sprinkle not long after. He sighed and made his way back to his car and sat there for a while, pure silence engulfing him. It was broken as the started the ignition, the engine roaring, overpowering the sound of wind and rain droplets hitting the top and windows of the car. He took one last look at the cemetery before driving back home.

On his way back he stumbled upon a young man down the street, drenched by the rain and shivering from the cold. Dean pulled the car over and rolled the window, flinching as some rain hit his face.

“Hey, you want a lift?” He asked unlocking the doors. He was shocked as he noticed the man as the same guy from the flower shop and funeral. 

“Uhm, yeah please.” He said looking through the window. “Oh, Dean, hello!” He exclaimed, surprised as well.

“You gotta be kidding me. Alright, you soggy son of a bitch get in the car.” Dean said chuckling.

“What are you calling me a bitch for assbutt?!” The man said, slightly offended.

“Assbutt? Okay, dickhole.” Dean said as the man got in the car.

“You’re just a bag of gems you ass.” He said.

“Thank you.” Dean said with a smirk. “So where we headed?”

“Pine Street.” 

“Gotcha.”

The ride was silent for a few minutes, the only noise was the mystery man’s teeth chattering. Dean felt bad, the heating in his car was broken and he didn’t know how to help the poor guy.

“So you wanna tell me why you were walking home in the rain?” Dean asked.

“I don’t have a car.” The man replied simply.

“Ever thought of I don’t know, buying one?” Dean said.

“I’m saving up for a telescope.” The man said.

“A telescope? Are you serious?” Dean laughed.

“Very much so.” The man replied.

“You’re funny. I like you.” Dean said, trying to stop laughing.

“You think it’s funny, but have you ever thought about what’s beyond us? I mean, the beauty of the stars and how the moon illuminates the dark sky and how light never leaves us. I think that’s beautiful you know? How even in the dark there’s always a beam of light waiting to guide you.” He said with a wide smile. Dean didn’t reply, only turned to him and gave him a half smile.

“You know I never learned your name.” Dean said after a brief silence.

“Castiel.” The man said.

“Can I call you Cas?” Dean asked.

“I’d be surprised if you didn’t. No one calls me by my full name.” As replied with a chuckle.

“Then why do you give people your full name?” Dean asked, curious.

“I don’t know, never gave much thought to it.” Cas shrugged.  
“Well, it’s definitely a different name,” Dean said. Cas gave him a frown as he thought he didn’t like the name, Dean noticed after a few seconds. “Different in a good way,” he corrected himself, “I really like it Castiel.” He said giving him a warm smile which Cas graciously returned.

They arrived at Castiel’s apartment complex after 5 minutes.

“I’ll see you around Cas.” Dean said turning to give Cas a pat on the shoulder.

“Thank you for the ride Dean, and I hope so.” Cas said with a shy smile before getting out of the car and covering his head with his coat to protect himself from the pouring rain. Dean watched him run up the stairs, stifling a laugh when he slipped. He shook his head smiling before driving away from the complex.


	2. Chapter 2

October 13th, 1972

Dean had gone back to the flower shop every day for a whole month to get flowers for Adam and strike a conversation with Cas, while also making sure Sammy never broke anything in said shop. Their conversations were normally small talk, like the weather or the flowers, or sometimes Cas would go into a poetic speech about the universe and Dean would just stand there and listen to whatever the man had to say. Even though it was simple chit chat, the boys enjoyed it nonetheless. Dean enjoyed the way Cas’ eyes would sparkle whenever he spoke about something he was passionate about, how he would let himself free, and Dean, he wanted nothing more than to stare at those blue eyes and listen to the beauty that was Cas’ mind. Castiel admired the way Dean smiled, his eyes crinkling at the sides when he laughed. His laugh was another thing he loved, to him, it was a sound he never wanted forget, he thought it was filled with life, with hope, with joy, it was completely and utterly intoxicating.

Cas was currently at his apartment studying for his astronomy final. An astronomy textbook was shoved up his face as he tried desperately to remember the formula for luminosity. He rubbed his forehead, his brain hurting from the countless hours of reading and taking notes. He was too involved in his studies to realize some had knocked on his door.

“Castiel Novak if you’re studying again so help me I will throw you off this building!” He heard someone shout from the other side of the door. He rolled his eyes and stood from the small worn down couch and made his way to open the door. His mood perked up when he saw his best friend Gabriel standing outside with a bag full of snacks. He was dressed in a dirty brown suit with a navy blue tie, his usual attire.

“It's nice to see you, Gabriel,” Cas said smiling, giving the other man a loose hug. He moved to the side to allow him to walk in and shut the door afterward.

“You too Cassy.” Gabriel said gleefully, but once he took one glance at all of Cas’ books scattered on the couch and floor he turned to his friend, scolding him. He saw the textbook in Cas’ hand and snatched from him, throwing it over his shoulder and flinching at the sound when it hit the ground.

“What? I can’t fail my tests! I have a full ride, I can’t just toss it in the garbage.” Cas said, placing his hands on his hips.

“Alright that’s it, we’re going out.” Gabriel said, dropping the grocery bag.

“Like hell, we are! I need to study! Besides, you brought snacks, we can snack while I read and you watch some lame T.V. show.” Cas suggested.

“Nah.” Gabriel said, grabbing Cas’ coat from the floor and throwing it at him. “We’re going to the horse race and you are going to enjoy it.” Castiel groaned in response.

“But you have to dress nice for that and all I have is rags.” Cas pouted.

“Well guess what Casarella, I’m your fairy godmother and I will find you something to wear to the horse race ball thing. Now where’s your closet?” Gabriel said, rubbing his hand together. Cas rolled his eyes and pointed to the short hallway.

“First door to your right, it’s to the right of the bed.” Cas said, and Gabriel walked towards it.

After a few minutes of digging, Gabriel came out with a pair of black slacks, a white button-down, a striped necktie, and a pair of decent black shoes.

“Wow, good job.” Cas said, obviously impressed. Gabriel responded with a small bow before shoving Castiel into the restroom with the clothes so he could change. He walked back out a few minutes later, the tie in his hand seeing as he didn’t know how to tie one.

“Not bad Cassy. Let me see that tie.” Gabriel said, taking the tie and wrapping it around Cas’ neck and tying it.

“Can’t we just stay here?” Cas complained as his friend adjusted his collar.

“No, we can’t. We’ll get some food, a few beers, and pick a few ladies. It’ll be great.” Gabriel said.

“You’re paying.” Cas said with his eyebrows raised.

“Yeah, yeah whatever. Okay, let’s go Cassandra.” The older man said.’

They drove to the tracks in Gabriel’s car, Cas was grateful that the heating worked. It was a 15-minute drive up the country and Cas looked out of the window every now and then, admiring the vegetation and livestock that grazed it, lost in the beauty that was mother nature. 

They ended up next to a few cars parked in a small dirt patch just outside of the tracks. Cas threw his jacket on the moment he left the warmth of the car, his breath becoming smoke in the cold air. Cas was given money to buy benedictine sandwiches and glasses of bourbon while Gabriel went to pay for their entrance ticket. Cas, of course, doesn’t drink alcohol so he grabbed Gabriel his bourbon and snagged some water for himself.

They made it to their seats just in time for the announcer to call out the jockey’s names.

“And with number 18 we have a long time champion, Mr. Dean Winchester!”

Cas’ sudden disinterest turned into curiosity as he turned his eyes to the jockey and the horse that was trotting up to the racing gates. He waited in anticipation as the rest of the racers were called and made their way to the post position, his eyes never leaving the so-called Dean Winchester. 

“Man, I hope that Winchester wins this. I bet 10 dollars on that boy.” Gabriel said.

“You bet how much?” Cas asked, mortified at that amount of money.

“Eh don’t worry, the track’s wet fast, so I think he’ll be alright.” Gabriel said, taking a swig of the bourbon.

“Are you telling me that, or reassuring yourself?” Cas laughed.

“Oh shut it.” After a few moments the race started, the bell ringing sent Cas to the edge of his seat, silently cheering for the man with the number 18 on his back.

“C’mon Dean.” He whispered to himself as the horses cut the curb. He was in the center of the crowd of horses, and they were all tightly packed, no one reaching far enough to take a good lead. Castiel had his eyes locked onto the jockey, biting his nails every so often. Suddenly the crowd erupted in cheers as Dean swiveled away from the crowd of horses and made a break for the lead, causing people to stand and watch like stunned deer.

“Winchester has taken a huge lead on Jackson as they approach the last quarter mile, but Jackson and Blevins are on his tail! Can he do it? Can he bring home a win? By God Joseph, he’s done it!” The race caller said as Dean crossed the finish line with other following close after him.

“Haha! I knew this young was worth the money!” Gabriel said, cheering and clapping along with the rest of crowd.

The crowd had calmed down and began to leave the stadium as Dean was receiving his award and speaking to the local news reporter. Cas stayed in his seat while Gabriel went to pick up the betting money, playing with his uneaten sandwich that was still in its wrapper. He stood only when he saw Dean approach the stands to meet with who he presumed was his trainer. 

“Dean!” He called out to him, smiling when the jockey turned to him and gave him a wide smile and walked over to him. He climbed over the metal bar and jogged up the steps to where Cas stood.

“Cas, hey! I didn’t expect to see you here!” Dean said, hitting Cas’ shoulder softly.

“Neither did I. You did great out there! I didn’t think this was what you did.” Cas said chuckling.

“Well, I’m full of surprises. How are you?” Dean asked.

“I’m good! You know just studying for school, but you know that’s expected for a college kid, What about you?” Cas replied with a smile.

“You’re going to college? Wow, impressive.” Dean said, nodding his head in approval “I’ve just been training with my uncle Bobby mostly, and going to your flower shop of course.” He finished, causing Cas to shake his head and laugh.

“Cassandra!” Gabriel called out to Cas.

“That public nuisance. I gotta go, Dean, I’ll see you around!” Cas said as he started walking past Dean, but not before Dean grabbed him by his bicep.

“Wait I gotta ask you something, and bare with me it’s a very personal question, but are you uh, into guys you know like you would be into girls? I don’t know how to explain it its just-“

“Are you asking if I’m a homosexual?” Cas asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Well, yeah kinda.” Dean said nervously.

“Tell me one thing Dean Winchester, why would I disclose information like that?” Castiel asked, cocking his head to the side.

“Its just-“

“Hey, Casanova. hurry up! I gotta pick Jessica up from school!” Gabriel called out again.

“I’ll see you, Dean.” Cas smiled before running to his best friend who was beyond irritated at the fact that he had to wait so long.

 

———————————————

Dean went back to the flower shop early the next morning.

He walked through the door, hearing the familiar jingle of the shop keepers bell. He looked around the shop before setting his eyes on Cas who was reading a jotting down notes on the counter. He was too far gone into the book to realize someone had walked in and hadn’t even heard the bell.

Dean smiled and bit his lip. He shook his head and wondered if he should return later, he’d hate to interrupt the kid. He went against his good judgment and walked over to the counter.

“Cas.” Dean said, leaning over the counter and crossing his left foot over the right one. Cas was startled and almost dropped the book in his hand.

“Dean, oh my god you scared the shit out of me.” Cas said, setting the book and pen down.

“Yeah I can see that.” Dean laughed.

“Don’t be an assbutt.” Cas scolded.

“Whatever dickhole.” Dean chuckled and rolled his eyes.

“You’re here early. What can I do for ya?” Castiel asked.

“Just wanted to chat.” Dean shrugged, playing with the pencil at the edge of the counter.

“You came here at 9 in the morning to ‘chat’? Cas asked, scoffing.

“What? I can visit a pal of mine?” Dean retorted.

“Oh, so we’re pals now?” Cas laughed. 

“Well I’ve been coming here for the past month so I feel our bond should have a label you know? Pals, amigos.” Dean smiled.

“You’re an odd one, Dean Winchester.” Cas chuckled, picking up his book again.

“Truth is, I have training in a half hour and I didn’t want to lounge around my house waiting.” Dean shrugged.

“Well I’m glad you dropped by, you’re nice company.” Castiel smiled.

“You know you never answered my question yesterday.” Dean said, raising an eyebrow at the man in front of him.

“Which would be?” Cas asked, already concentrating on the book.

“Are you homosexual?” Dean asked, peeking at the title of the book and shaking his head as he read The Sleep Walkers.

“And if I am?” Cas responded, not taking his eyes off the printed words. Dean rolled his eyes and took the book from Cas’ hand. “Hey give that back!”

“Some of the greatest discoveries...consist mainly in the clearing away of psychological roadblocks which obstruct the approach to reality; which is why to post factum they appear so obvious.” Dean read aloud as his face scrunched up in confusion. “He’s comparing psychology with astronomy?”

“Yes.” Cas said, snatching the book back and setting it next to his notebook. “Believe it or not Dean, our mind are much like the universe. We hold infinite possibilities, infinite ideas, infinite ways of living. There’s so much we don’t know what’s out there, so much we don’t know about ourselves.” Castiel said with such passion that had Dean questioning his life choices.

“Well, that speech just made me want to go buy the next kid I see a lollipop.” Dean said, causing Cas to shake his head and chuckle. “What do you say Cas, can I take you out?” Dean asked, leaning over the counter and setting the book back down. Cas looked at his hand and took a deep breath before letting out a laugh.

“Dean Winchester, a successful horse jockey asking out a local flower shop worker who can’t even afford a car. I can’t lie, I’m surprised.” Cas said shaking his head.

“What? Someone like me can’t ask someone like you out?” Dean retorted.

“Someone like me? Tell me, Dean, what am I like?” Cas asked with over-exaggerated interest.

“You know, cute, funny, deep, intelligent, someone who has a strong passion for something.” Dean answered, smirking when he saw Castiel blush. “Don’t go blushing up on me now.”

“I wasn’t- I’m not blushing!” Castiel argued, but the new found heat on his face said otherwise.

“Let me take you out Cas.” Dean said after a brief silence, genuine interest in the man flourishing through his words. Cas sighed and looked Dean in the eyes, searching for a hint of this being a sick joke, but he found nothing. His pulse rose and his body felt several degrees warmer than usual as he tried to keep a wide smile from plastering on his face.

“Okay.” Cas said, just above a whisper. A smile spread on Dean’s face, his hand taking Castiel’s and giving it a small squeeze. 

“I’ll pick you up at 8.” Dean said.

“Pick me up at 8.” Cas smiled and looked down, his cheeks burning and he’d be too embarrassed for Dean to see him so flustered. He heard Dean laugh slightly before he dropped his hand.

“You’re cute.” Dean said, his smile never leaving his face as Castiel looked up to face the man.

“Okay you know what it is 9:15, go to your stupid training.” Cas laughed and walked around the corner to push Dean to the door. Once Dean was outside of the shop he turned to face the shorter man to give him a kiss on the cheek. He chuckled when he saw Cas’ cheeks turn impossibly red.

“I’ll see you at 8.” Dean said, biting his lip before turning on his heels and walking over to his car. Cas watched him get in his car and drive away. He stood, leaning against the door, unable to fathom how someone like Dean Winchester could have an interest in someone like Castiel Novak.

Dean drove happily down the country to his uncle’s ranch, I’ll Be There by ABC blasting on the radio. He neared the old house covered with thick grass and rolled down his window to wave at his aunt Ellen who was feeding their dogs. He parked behind Bobby’s old pick up and stepped out of the car, greeting Ellen with a big hug when she walked over to him.

“Morning Ellen.” Dean said, keeping an arm around her as they walked into the house. There were horseshoes, pictures of Dean at races, and drawings that Sammy gave to them hung on the wall. The carpet was old and dusty from all the time's shoes were cleaned on it. 

“Dean! You’re early for once.” Bobby said, emerging from the kitchen with a cup of coffee. Dean laughed and let his arm fall from Ellen as she walked down the hall to study room.

“C’mon let just get out there.” Dean said and Bobby nodded, leading him out to the horse stables. They went to Dean’s tan mare, she neighed when he set eyes on the two boys.

“I’ll get the equipment.” Bobby said, walking over to the shed a few feet away from the stables.

“Hey, sweetheart.” Dean said, scratching her nose. “How’s my Annabelle?” He said, opening the gate and guiding her out to the open grass field. Bobby walked back with Dean’s helmet and Annabelle’s saddle, tossing the helmet at Dean before throwing the saddle over the mare.

“We’re gonna do a mile today, but first I want you to warm her up with a trot around those trees out there.” Bobby said, buckling the saddle under Annabelle’s belly. Dean nodded and put his helmet on, it was white a green stripe running down the middle of it. He grabbed the horn of the saddle and hooked his foot on the strip before swinging his other leg over and sitting on the seat.

“Good girl.” Dean said, patting the mare’s neck and walking her out of the stable, Bobby walking with them. He kicked her thigh ever so slightly and she started on a trot, Dean guiding her around the tree and back. They repeated around the short track before Dean gave her a slightly harder kick and she was off, the bit in her mouth rattling against her teeth. She was at an in-hand pace, but nothing short of fast, causing Dean to bounce up and down the seat every so often.

They finished training an hour later.

“Do you want to join us for dinner today? Ellen’s making her famous casserole.” Bobby asks, leading Annabelle back to her stable by her reigns.

“As tempting as that sounds… I can’t Bobby, I’ve got a date tonight.” Dean said with a wild smile plastered on his face that didn’t go unnoticed by his uncle.

“Who’s the lady that’s got you all lovey-dovey?” Bobby asked as he unbuckled the saddle and removed it from Annabelle.

“She’s a he.” Dean sighed. “I did tell you that I’m intersexual right?” Dean asked, hoping he did tell him, or else this was going to be one hell of a conversation.

“Yeah you told me, but I didn’t think you’d land a guy so soon.” bobby chuckled, setting the saddle on a pile of hay next to Annabelle’s stable. “What’s his name?”

“Castiel.” Dean replied, the smile still evident on his face.

“Castiel? That’s an odd name.” Bobby said with a confused look.

“Yeah but it’s unique, guess that’s why I like it so much.” Dean spoke, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

“Well, you be careful with whatever you have planned alright? You’ve got a big race next week and I can’t have you getting injured ya here?” Bobby said sternly, receiving a nod from his nephew. “But most importantly, have fun, boy.” He finished, patting Dean’s shoulder.

———————————————

Dean waited in the truck he borrowed from Bobby for a few moments before taking a deep breath and checking the time on the radio. 8:02pm. He told himself he couldn’t show up too early or on time since he thought it made himself seem desperate. He smoothed his shirt before leaving his car, looking up at the apartment complex. He remembers vividly one time when he had to take Castiel up to his apartment, the older man was exhausted from working so late and Dean couldn’t find it in himself to allow the poor boy to trudge up the steps and risk falling back down. 

_They pulled up in front of the apartments, Castiel’s head was heavy on the window as sleep threatened to consume him then and there. He felt the engine turn off and he raised his had to see they were at their destination._

_“Thanks again for the ride Dean.” Castiel yawned and opened the car door. Dean couldn’t help but smile at how cute the boy was in his sleepy state._

_“Hey, Cas you sure you’ll be alright walking up the stairs? You can barely walk.” Dean said, concerned for the dark haired boy. “Cas?” He asked when he didn’t get a response, laughing to himself when he figured out he was dozing off as he leaned against the door. Dean shook his head and exited the vehicle to help Cas. He wrapped a hand around his waist and threw one of Cas’s hands over his shoulder to help support him. Cas didn’t say anything, only hummed in approval._

_They walked slowly, mainly because Dean was afraid if they went too fast, Cas would end up falling. Slowly but surely, however, they made their way up the old rusted steps to the door of Cas’ apartment, room 129. Cas reached into his jean pocket and pulled out the key, sliding it into the keyhole and unlocking the door. Dean opened the door and lead him inside, it was dark and he couldn’t find the light switch so he had to feel around to find the couch._

_“I’m good here, thank you, Dean,” Cas said into the darkness as Dean helped him down onto the old couch._

_“Get some rest, you need it.” Dean said, feeling his way back to the door._

_“Goodnight Dean >” Cas yawned, before drifting back to sleep, laying uncomfortably._

_“Night Cas.” Dean smiled, before shutting the door behind him and going on his way._

Dean was nearing the apartment, whispering to himself to calm down. He couldn’t lie, he was beyond nervous. He had a thing for Cas since the day he first met him at the flower shop, he found him intriguing, he wasn’t like any other person he’d ever met. He was special, Dean was sure of that.

He knocked on the wooden door three times before taking a step back, fidgeting against the balcony railing. The door unlocked after a few seconds and out came Castiel, dressed in a plain black long sleeve, navy blue jeans, worn out boots, with his hair messy as ever, and a wide smile etched onto his face. Dean was at a loss for words, he knew he was staring but couldn’t bring himself to look away from the man in front of him. He was mesmerized, he thought he was beautiful.

“Hi.” Cas said shyly, a rosy tint appearing on his cheek as he felt Dean’s eyes on him.

“Hey, Cas.” Dean said after a few more seconds. “You ready?”

“Yeah.” Cas replied, smiling when Dean held his arm out for him, in which he wrapped his hand around his bicep. They walked closely together as they walked back to the truck, Cas’ gaze fixated on the ground while Dean just couldn’t stop looking at the shorter man. When they arrived at the truck, like the gentleman he is, Dean opened the door for Cas and shut it for him when he was in. 

They drove out of town to a small grass field that was enveloped by the darkness of the night. Cas was confused, to say the least, he wasn’t sure why they were out in the middle of nowhere, and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t the least bit scared.

“We’re here.” Dean said, parking the truck and looking over to the other man.

“Is this the part where you knock me out and kidnap me?” Cas asked, turning to face Dean who replied with a small chuckle.

“If I wanted to kidnap you, don’t you think I would’ve done it earlier? Like, say that one time you were practically drunk from being so tired?” Dean asked.

“If that was your attempt at making me feel less uncomfortable at the fact that we’re in the middle of nowhere, then you failed.” Cas replied. Dean shook his head and smiled before getting out of the truck. Cas was already getting out himself before he got the chance to open the door for him like he did back at the apartment complex, so instead, he moved to the tailgate and unlatching it. On the truck bed was a few a blankets along with pillows and a wooden box resting next to them. Dean reached for the box and gave it a good glance before turning to Cas and handing it to him.

“I know you’re normally supposed to give flowers to your date, but I wanted to think outside the box.” Dean said with a nervous smile. Cas tilted his head as he stared at the box before opening it slowly. Inside there was an old telescope, painted black and gold with polished lenses.

“Dean, where did you get this?” Cas asked in awe as he removed it from the box. 

“I know a guy that collects old stuff and I saw this in his collection. It took a lot of convincing but he finally sold it to me. I remember you saying you were saving up for one, so I thought I’d save you the trouble.” Dean replied, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his jacket. Cas didn’t say anything, only marveled at the telescope before giving Dean the tightest hug his small frame would allow him.

“Thank you, thank you so much.” He whispered before pulling away.

“I thought our date could be star gazing. You seem to love the universe so I thought this would be okay.” Dean said shyly, unsure of what Cas would think of it.

“Okay? Dean, it’s perfect. No one’s ever gone through so much trouble for me before.” Cas said with a wide smile as he turned his head up towards the night sky. “C’mon, let me show you some constellations.” He said before climbing atop the truck bed and pulling Dean up with him.

“How do you know if it’s a constellation and not just a blob of stars?” Dean asks, looking up the endless clusters of shining orbs of light that give company to the moon.

“I study them, so I have a good knowledge of them, but it’s fun to use your imagination. You can just look up and see a shape and identify it as something. The possibilities are endless, and I find that fascinating, how the stars can be anything and everything.” Cas replied, putting the telescope on its stand and peeking through it to gaze closer at the stars. He was lost in the dark abyss that was the sky, studying and marveling at the world beyond them.

They sat in the truck for hours, Cas pointing and explaining a cluster of stars to Dean, and sometimes Dean would let his imagination run free while looking through the telescope. He saw a flower once, and he was more than excited to show Cas. They took a break, eating the sandwiches Dean had packed while still looking up in adoration to the night.

“Dean?” Cas asked, laying down to rest on one of the pillows.

“Yeah, Cas?” Dean replied, following his lead and laying the blankets.

“Do you ever think about how we ended up here? On Earth? How we were chosen to live on a planet that could sustain life? Or just the fact that we exist? Life is rare, and I think it’s beautiful that we’re here, now, able to look at the beauty that is the universe. Almost like it was made for us to see. The stars, the moon, the sun, the blue sky, how they all meet the horizon before appearing and disappearing.” Cas said, turning to look at Dean before fixating his eyes back to the sky above them.

Dean didn’t reply, how could he. Cas made these beautiful statements about the life they live in an infinite universe, and he couldn’t find the words to describe how beautiful his words were. 

The small glimpse of Cas’s eyes made Dean want to love the man more than he already. Cas thought the infinite was beautiful, but Dean thought Cas was beautiful. How his blue eyes were visible and shining even in the black of the night. The words he spoke mesmerized Dean, they were beautiful.

Yes, the infinite above them was beautiful. Cas’ words, thoughts, and ideas were beautiful too. 

Dean was sure that Cas was his infinite.


End file.
